Where Is the Lair?
The home is not the one tame place in the world of adventure. It is the one wild place in the world of rules and set tasks.
—G. K. Chesterton
While the coffin or crypt is considered de rigueur, a vampire’s lair isn’t always a funerary box, though many vampires do still utilize them as a style choice that’s in keeping with the mythology that has sprouted around their kind, thanks to popular fiction. As with almost anyone you will meet during your dating life, they will already have a home, a house, or a lair, someplace where they can crash for the day, and where your vampire lays his head will give you valuable information about him.
A vampire’s primary concern with regard to his lair is purely health-related: The electromagnetic-radiation spectrum that sunlight emits is physically harmful. While some closed-minded and puritanical individuals believe that the vampire’s aversion to sunlight is a religious allegory of sorts that illustrates the wrath of God or some such nonsense, the truth is that the vampire’s skin cannot process ultraviolet rays in the same fashion that human skin can, and prolonged exposure to the sun’s radiation breaks down the DNA structure of the vampire’s unique blood type. Exposure to sunlight does not cause the sudden and dramatic conflagration popularized in fiction (although that looks really cool in movies); the effects of sunlight on a vampire’s blood is akin in some ways to the effects of nuclear radiation on humans. In addition, the vampire’s skin’s susceptibility to photo damage is acute. Over time, exposure to the sun causes permanent cell death, from the dermis inward, resulting in necrosis or death due to the cells’ loss of reproductive ability.
As such, vampires choose to sleep in areas that are sealed completely from sunlight, and their choices of resting place are as varied as their personalities. In our travels, we have met vampires that utilize contemporary panic rooms, abandoned bomb shelters, and bank vaults, as well as mansions and townhouses. Most vampires have access to a considerable amount of money, and many have specially built, completely secure subterranean rooms within their homes. Scientifically inclined vampires may utilize a pyrheliometer to accurately measure the solar radiation flux density within their lair to ensure their safety, but most do away with such extreme obsessiveness.
So for vampires, their home is a matter of life and death. The last thing you will be able to do is jump in and “spruce it up” a little. Tread lightly, and do not push to see their abode. If so inclined, they will, over a period of time, invite you to their place of safety.
Where their “crypt” is located says a lot about how confident they may or may not be about their abilities as a vampire and to get around unnoticed in human civilization. Geographically, vampires can be found anywhere in the world. Although it is rare to find vampires living in countries north of the polar circle during the time of the midnight sun, during their months of darkness, Arctic settlements have been very popular with vampires. However, Nordic vampires must exercise extreme caution when venturing forth, even during the darker months. Though UV radiation is comparatively weak during dawn and twilight, fresh snow can reflect as much as 80 percent of the suns rays, so even in dimmer light, vampires may be exposed to high amounts of solar radiation. Tromsø, Norway, for example, is a contradiction of sorts. From April until August, the city has traditionally been a haven for those seeking to flee a vampire’s wrath, while from late November to January, it is a sanctuary for Homo striga.
In other words, for all practical purposes, a vampire’s lair is the Bat Cave. Not only is it his place of rest, but it is also where he plots and schemes, advancing his convoluted machinations. In his lair, he is protected from prying eyes and is safeguarded against the perils of solar radiation and human interference. If you are lucky enough to visit a vampire domicile, take a good look around. Think about its location and consider the following questions things, as their answers will all point out some personality pluses or minuses in your dark ones desires:
Is the lair near an urban area? In one respect, this would allow the vampire easier pickings come feeding time and may even help them to keep their hungry eyes away from you. On the other hand, it may make the chance of discovery a more probable occurrence. Have they weighed both options well?
Is the lair above ground or subterranean? One might think it is traditional for the home or crypt to be below the ground. Some of this comes from our old thinking about cemeteries and such. But consider the fact that vampires can’t live in or even cross running water. Seldom would they have that problem if they lived in a place that were aboveground.
What is the window situation? We all know the vampire’s problem with sunlight. Will they have to remember to close curtains or shut the shades every morning? At night when they are entertaining you at home, will passersby or neighbors be able to see into the lit quarters?
Does your vampire own their own place, having been successful in the passing years or centuries of gathering money? This would allow them to customize their lair in any manner they saw fit. If they are renting or leasing, or even if they stay with you and you are renting or leasing, there is always the possibility of a nosey landlord ruining things for everyone concerned.
It is also important to remember that the numerous locks, alarms, and other safety precautions that vampires utilize in their sleeping spaces are not to keep you out and are not even simple matters of desiring privacy or solitude. They are matters of safety, period.