CHAPTER 1
GREETINGS
Hi! I’m Jamie Brown. This is my family.
JAMIE BROWN
SKILLS: Mini golf,
imagining things, creating
TOP FIVE lists, circus skills,
card tricks, having FUN!
MARCUS BROWN
(My dad)
SKILLS: Fixing things,
acting like a kid, organising
street parties, being the
second most welcoming
person ever.
TRACEY BROWN
(My mum)
SKILLS: Making a feast
out of very few ingredients,
fixing clothes, being the most
welcoming person ever.
KATIE BROWN
(My sister)
SKILLS: Burping, eating
bugs, dancing.
So that’s us. We live on Hovel Street, and we live with 20 other families in the Grand Hotel … which isn’t a hotel anymore … and isn’t grand anymore either, so it’s really not a grand hotel, more a grungy, falling-down building.
If you haven’t guessed it, we’re kind of poor. We have one room between all of us, there’s barely any carpet on the floor, and we have to hide at least three times every year when the landlord comes knocking for the overdue rent.
So when I say kind of poor, I mean that if a rich person found some spare money under their couch, and they donated 99% of it to charity, and then they bought some take-away food (which we’ve NEVER done!), and they got some change, and they gave half that change to the hobo on the street, that hobo would have more than what Dad earns working two boring jobs he hates.
Yep, we live on the wrong side of the wrong side of the tracks.
*** This picture is to scale! The cockroaches are huge, and I’m guessing the money bags are too!
The thing is … I don’t care! I know Mum and Dad sometimes talk about how they would love to give me and Katie a better life, and it gets really cold in winter, and we never have a lot of food, but Mum can make a feast out of herbs, a carrot and a banana, and we sit close to stay warm, and it’s all I’ve ever known.
This street. This building. These people.
And they are awesome people.
These are my best friends, the Johnston Triplets. No one on Hovel Street but me can tell them apart, not even their parents! Can YOU spot the difference?
MAXY
SKILLS (left):
Mini-golf,
sultana
catching.
JOHNNY
SKILLS (middle):
Mini-golf,
sultana
catching.
TRAV
SKILLS (right):
Limited.
Very limited.
And this is Mr Kravoski.
MR KRAVOSKI
SKILLS: Circus skills, card tricks, eyebrow wiggling.
His real name is Igor Kravoski, but I call him Mr Kravoski. He’s a bit nutty, but he’s awesome, too. He’s about 100 years old and he uses a walking stick he found on the street and he was in a Russian circus!
‘I was greatest card trickster in world for twenty-one year straight,’ he’d tell me in his Russian accent. ‘Not even Dosdonovic do that. People amaze at my skill. No one guess tricks!’
TOP FIVE REASONS
I BELIEVED HIM
1. He was BRILLIANT at card tricks.
2. He was big and hairy and scary and if you didn’t believe him he would swear at you in Russian.
3. No one on Hovel Street could work out his tricks and they were always amazed at his skill.
4. He taught ME to do his tricks.
5. I wanted to.
He’d done everything in the circus, from card tricks to magic to clowning to trapeze, and he’d loved it all … except when he trained the monkeys back in 1957.
I sit with Mr Kravoski every afternoon after school and he teaches me circus skills. He’s taught me how to juggle and pull hankies out of my ears and do cartwheels and how to make people laugh just by wiggling your eyebrows (and maybe using some fake teeth).
The best things he teaches me, though, are the card tricks, and especially the back of the pants trick, even though I can never get it right.
1. Double up on two cards (in this example, the 2 of hearts). Have one in the pack.
2. Take the spare card and secretly slip it in your target’s pocket.
3. Make sure your card is on top of the pack. Then tell everyone you will attempt an incredible card trick!
4. Tell your target to take the top card, look at it, then replace it into the pack.
5. Shuffle the cards thoroughly, then look through and select any random card. (In this example, the 5 of spades.) Ask ‘Is this your card?’
6. Pretend to be upset when everyone says you suck, then tell your target to check his back pocket.
7. Accept everyone’s compliments!!!
Oooooh, I love this one too.
1. Secretly check the bottom card (in this example, the 3 of clubs).
2. Cut the cards in half (move cards off the top to the side – don’t use a knife).
3. Have your target select a card off either pile, look at it and don’t tell you.
4. Have them replace their card (in this example, the ace of spades) on the pile that doesn’t have your card at the bottom.
5. Place the pile with your card on top of the other pile.
6. Cut the cards a few times. Take cards off the top, place them on the table, then place the other pile on top.
7. One by one place cards off the top of the pack, face up on the table. The card you are looking for will be the one after your card.
8. Accept everyone’s compliments!!!