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Azrael's Bargain

Written by Terry Howard

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"Hey, Jimmy. Why don't I ever see you down at the rail yard anymore?" It was a cold winter night and Club 250 had its every-night regulars and as many more folks who weren't. The young man talking to Jimmy Dick was one of the latter.

Jimmy Dick gazed down the length of his beer bottle at the fellow he thought of as "the kid." Right after the Ring of Fire, when everyone was scrambling to pitch in and make things work, he'd taken a job with the railroad and joined the army. The rails kept the power plant in coal and the army kept the town from being overrun. Now he was in the reserves and the scramble to stay alive was over.

"They don't need me," Jimmy replied.

"Bull shit. You were a lot of help."

"Yeah. They could use me . . . but they don't need me. There's enough people to get the job done."

"Yeah, okay. But the money's good, and you were good at it."

"Don't need the money. Why work?"

"Ah, come on. You can always use a little more."

Jimmy had gotten by up-time without working because of the disability payments he picked up in Nam (Agent Orange was a bit more effective than it needed to be), and what little profit there was from the real estate holdings he had inherited. There were a lot of vacancies in town at the time. Now the pension was gone but the real estate more than covered things. He didn't need to work to get by and he saw no reason to get ahead.

"Hey, Ken, give me a glass and another beer." Jimmy had to ask for a glass. Bottled beer was becoming synonymous with cold beer. Down-timers wanted it at room temperature in a mug and it was tapped out of a keg. Up-timers wanted it cold. It's easier to chill bottles in ice than it is to cool a keg. Mugs were a down-time thing so most members of the 250 clan had taken to drinking out of the bottle as a social statement. When it arrived, Jimmy poured the rest of his current beer into the glass and then started pouring the new bottle in after it.

"Damn it, Jimmy, stop pouring. It's over flowing already," the kid said.

"Oh? So there is such a thing as not needing a little more."

"I was talking about money."

"Same thing. When you got enough, why get more?"

"Save it for retirement."

"You ever saved half a beer overnight?"

"'Course not. It goes flat."

"That's my point."

"I wasn't talking about beer. Money's different."

Jimmy sighed. How do you convince a young man that he needs to enjoy the journey because the destination might be disappointing? "Kid, let me tell ya a story.

"Seems a rich man died. When the angel of death came to collect him the fellow was setting there on a pile of baggage. Well Azrael looked at him and . . ."

Jimmy's drinking partner interrupted. "Who's Azrael? I thought he was a character on the Smurfs?"

"Kid, Azrael is the name of the angel of death. I don't know nothin' about what's written on no sponge football.

"Anyway, Azrael says to the rich man, 'Time to go.'

"'Well give me a hand with this,' the rich man said, meaning his luggage.

"'Leave it. You don't need it where you're goin'.'

"'No way,' says the rich man. 'I worked all my life for this I ain't leaving it.'

"'Well, you can't take it with you.'

"'Then I ain't goin',' says the rich man.

"They argued about it for awhile and Azrael finally said, 'Look I don't have all eternity. I'll let you bring whatever you can carry. Grab what you can and leave the rest and let's get goin'.' The rich fellow, he agonizes over what to leave and what to take and finally grabs a suitcase in each hand. By the time they got to the pearly gates he was down to one and covered in sweat.

"Peter looked down at it and said, 'What's that?'

"'It's all the luggage the angel would let me bring.'

"'Well, I can tell you right now it ain't goin' in with you. What did you bring anyway?' The rich man huffed the tote up on the counter and opened it up. It was full of gold bars. A puzzled Peter looked at it and said, 'Paving stones? Why did you bring paving stones?'"

The kid laughed. "That's funny. What's the point?"

Jimmy sighed again and gave up. Sometimes it was just plain too much work to get an idea across. "The point is, I think we need a couple of cold ones down here. Hey, Ken, two more." Jimmy knew there weren't very many problems in this world you couldn't get to go away, at least for a while, if you just kept the beers coming. Maybe some day the kid would figure it out, but probably not.

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